I’m stressed, I need to sleep more, I need to work less. I’m tired, I don’t have energy to train, it’s too hard to eat healthy all the time. I have no drive, I need to find my passion in life, I’m just not happy.

These are all comments I’ve heard consistently during my first year as a personal trainer – from my clients, my friends, my family, my colleagues and even myself.

When you ask most people what they want in life, it’s happiness, a work life balance and good health – yet for most of us it seems to be impossible, but why? Why is it so hard to achieve a full quality of life, why is it so hard to look after ourselves, why is it so hard to look after our personal wellbeing? We all have stress, we all get tired and we all have days where we want to stay in bed and hide from the world. Occasionally that’s fine – but if that describes your daily life, it’s time for change.

I have recently transitioned from a personal trainer to a wellbeing coach, because even though it’s my job to help people achieve their physical goals, there always seem to be barriers and struggles in other aspects of their lives that impede results.
When you become a personal trainer, people tell you that you’ll also become a councillor – personally I love that, which is why I’ve decided, in my own way, to become both.

I can’t help someone lose weight if they are stressed. I can’t help someone train hard if they are exhausted and my most successful clients are the ones who have a holistic approach to life and concentrate on their overall wellbeing.

Wellbeing is defined as the state of being comfortable, healthy, or happy – and I believe these are all feelings we should achieve daily. Yet if you ask someone if they feel happy, healthy and comfortable in their day-to-day life, it’s not that often people can honestly say they do.

So, what’s the key to achieving wellbeing? I’m sorry to tell you this, but there isn’t one. Just like exercise, just like nutrition, our wellbeing is a journey that is going to be different for all of us, so we need to stop looking at what wellbeing is in general, but what wellbeing means to us individually, and then achieving wellbeing – your way.

Just like a training programme or nutrition plan, it needs to be individually tailored to your wants and needs. What is important in your life? What will help you achieve happiness? What will help you achieve a full quality of life – a life that gets you out of bed in the morning with a smile on your face which lasts until you hit the pillow at the end of the day?

We live a lifestyle that is full of responsibility, challenges, pressure and commitments, and there is nothing wrong with this. Responsibility is good – it keeps us accountable. Challenges are good – they push us to achieve our goals. Pressure is good – it helps us strive to be a better version of ourselves. Commitment is good – it gives us a reason to live each day. The downside is when we allow ourselves to become stressed, tired, unhealthy and lose track of our personal wellbeing.

So how do you achieve your own personal version of wellbeing, your way? I can’t give you all the answers. I’m simply someone who has an opinion, a perspective and a personal goal to not only achieve wellbeing, but to help others do the same. So here are my top five tips to help you achieve wellbeing, your way.

1: Define Wellbeing | Not by other’s standards, by your standards
Wellbeing is different to all of us – so figure out what’s important to you. Whether it’s good health, strength and fitness, career and purpose, family and friends, social life, down time and relaxation, self-worth and acceptance, confidence and charisma, happiness and quality of life. Maybe it’s one of these, maybe it’s none. Figure out what balance, quality of life and wellbeing means to you. Define it, own it.

2. Stop Prioritising | Everything that’s important to you is important
How many times have you made a list of what’s important to you, then decided what’s most important and what’s least important? Don’t do it – it devalues things and makes us concentrate on certain aspects of our life only, and that is when we lose balance. Everything that you want out of life is important, everything that is important to you is what helps you achieve wellbeing

3: Set Goals | Vivacious, Audacious, Exciting and Exhilarating Goals
Don’t be afraid of setting goals – they are something that we can succeed at, can fail at, can learn from and re-evaluate and re-define at any stage. So, if you want to something big, something crazy, something that makes your soul soar and your heart smile then do it. If you fail, who cares? Failure is what makes success, and success is a huge part of wellbeing.

4: Live your Truth | Do it for you, and only you – It’s Your Wellbeing
Why do what others want you to do? Why fall to the social pressures of what others think is right? Do what you think is right, do it for you. As long as you do it with drive, morals, values and stay true to who you are, then you’re succeeding in life and succeeding on your personal wellbeing journey.

5: Enjoy life and be happy | We only get one, so make the most of it
As defined earlier – wellbeing is the state of being comfortable, healthy, or happy. So, base your wellbeing plan with this being your overall goal. Aim to be healthy, aim to be happy. Aim to find self-love and stop caring what others think as quite frankly it’s none of their business. As long as you are happy, that’s all that matters – find wellbeing, find it your way.